on a completely un-political note...

i've decided that being a good person gets your nowhere.

being a nice, decent, caring person isn't worth it.

everyone is only looking out for themselves. no one REALLY cares about anyone else.
so, being that friend who will RUN down a flight of stairs on a broken foot, because your best friend is upset...sitting there with them while they cry....doesn't really mean anything.
because, at the end of the day, if they're happy, then you're an afterthought.

i will always be taken advantage of. i will always be walked all over.
i will always be that friend who is willing to do ANYTHING for her friends. i will sit with you and listen while you cry. and you will never hear me say a damn word about my life and my problems.
i will talk you though every situation. every break up. every heartache. every little crisis.
knowing, full well, that the SECOND everything is back to normal. the second that you're happy again...you'll be back out with those people who treated you like shit.
and i will be home. by myself.

because no one cares. not really. you need someone to go to when you feel like shit. someone who you know will always be there. no questions asked. no judgment. nothing.
will ALWAYS be there.

but you don't care. not really.


but it's not going to change. ever.
i can't stop being me.
i will never stop throwing birthday parties or making midnight "happy birthday" phone calls...even when i'm miles away. even though, when my birthday rolls around, i know i'll sit home alone.
i will never stop sitting with you when you're upset. leaving a party and my friends to talk to you. sitting with you for hours while you cry. sitting on the phone for hours. even though, when i'm upset, you don't even answer your phone.

yeah.
being a good person isn't worth it. because you will always just be taken for granted.
no one cares.
not really.